New Texas

      So, I wrote this movie where the world goes to chaos and all the people of America formed different colonies and the strongest one was of course "New Texas". Why am I writing about this? Well...

     A new UT (Wooo Longhorns!) and Texas Tribune Poll shows that a large majority of Texas wants the budget cut, but an even stronger majority hopes that we don't cut any large state funds. For instance, more than 60%of Texans oppose any cuts to Medicaid, Teahers Retirement, and almost every other expenditure the state has. It is a strange paradox when people want the budget cut but no one wants any "Program" cuts. 

     Republicans want CUTS. (Education, Public Services, etc.)

     Democrats want REVENUE. (Income Taxes, Legalize Gambling, etc.)

     The common consensus though by any real economist or level headed individual, would use characteristics from both. Cut a little of public ed and Medicare, tax a little bit from gambling. But the one thing I have a leaf about it, is Marijuana.

     Now, 41% of Texans wouldn't mind taxing Marijuana. This isn't enough to get a Congressman to write a bill for it, but it means progress. The truth is, the worse off the economy is, the more likely weed will be allowed to be smoked (and taxed) by all Texans. I predict that by the next year we'll see something toke up in Austin. A movement of hippies or something. Like the Willie Nelson "Tea Pot Party" Let's hop on that bandwagon all the way to cloud nine -_-

-Emmanuel Delfin

Weed Consult

TEXAS DEMOCRATS PLAN WALK OUT

BREAKING NEWS:

(DISCLAIMER: This is not a confirmed report nor is it happening yet this is just rumors around the offices)

     There are 49 Democrats in the Texas Legislature in Austin. Today they're apparently leaving. 

     As the day goes by, the vote counts grow less (can something grow less?) The Democrats are sneaking off the floor every bill that is read. 

Why?

     Democrats know as the time goes on, there is less hope for their bills to be heard and voted on, so they are going to their last resort. Playing hooky.

     There has been rumors in the hallways that the strategy is to force the Speaker of the House to call a "House Call" in order to keep 2/3rds of the house in session so the votes can still count. It is a tricky strategy. We will update you on how it goes.

When?

     Before HB 12 is read, this is the "Sanctuary City" bill that would ban cities from sheltering illegal immigrants. Controversial to say the least, so Democrats are working hard to make sure that their voice is heard...or not heard.

P.S. Remember the members that left in 2003, or more recently the Wisconsin walk-out. Imagine Austin like this:

Emmanuel Delfin

Texas Legislature Reporter

Cinco De Mayo

Abraham Lincoln Statue in Tijuana, Mexico

     It is Cinco De Mayo, and no it is not Mexican Independence Day. Today is the day where Mexico commemorates the valiant efforts of Mexico and America together cooperated to keep France from invading and dominating the entire continent. Here are some fun facts about the holiday:
- During 5 de May, 70 million pounds of avocado will be consumed
     (Whoa. That's a lotta diahrrea!)
- The actual holiday of Cinco De Mayo started in a California College
     (Cuz we know how to partay!!)
- Mexican's celebrate their Independence on Sept. 16, American companies made 5 de May popular
     (Soon there'll be a Coke 5....de Mayo)
- In Chandler, Arizona a race is held during the festival between 150 chihuahuahs
     (Whoa that's a lotta diarrhea!)

- Emmanuel (Pena)

Mexican Consultant/Gardener

WHOA! I AM NOT A VIRUS! I PROMISE! >:)

     If you've been on Facebook recently, you've either had a link posted on your wall or a message sent to you that proclaimed that you can watch the actual death photo of Osama Bin Laden with his eye shot up. However, if you look at the animation above, you can see that it is clearly photoshopped. DO NOT CLICK IT. Hell, I've seen pictures of Bigfoot more realistic than this one! But pictures of Bigfoot wouldnt hack my computer. He is a gentle cyber giant.

      You aren't the only ones fooled though. A lot of Senators and Congressman said that they saw these photos and didn't know whether or not they were authentic. Now, with all this fake stuff flying around, more pressure is on Obama to show the real stuff! He said he wouldn't release them, but should he? If he doesn't then who knows which photos are real. Is THIS one real?

-Emmanuel Delfin

Chief Virus Protector Analyst

Best Political Cartoons from Pulitzer Prize winning Cartoonist Mike Keefe

Who Killed Osama? A San Antonian Longhorn! That's who

Vice Admiral Bill McRaven, a Roosevelt High School grad from San Antonio is credited with planning the air raid that ultimelty  killed Osama Bin Laden, the leader of Al Quaeda. He was appointed the commander of the Joint Forces Special Operations division, and oversaw and planned every detail of the May 1st attack.


P.S. He also went to The University of Texas at Austin..."What Starts Here...kills Osama Bin Laden."

-Robert 

Chief Investigative Reporter

Twitter Explodes #TwitterExplodes

     Tweet. Tweet. Tweet. That used to be the sound of a bird. Nowadays in the New Tech Century, that is the sound of live status updates occurring 24/7. There are millions of user online every second around the world. From @JustinBieber tweeting in his high pitched voice, to @CNN reporting and interacting live every hour. It has become an integral part of communications. In the masses and in the minuses. Heck, if you follow my twitter @delfinunlimited, you may see how minus it can get!

     

     But, this weekend we saw how important or how big Twittering/Tweeting can be. Last night, almost 3,500 tweets tweeted...every second. At the peak, more than 5,000 updates were pumping out every second. Tweets from... "Is Osama dead?" to "Go to hell hairy man". Someone in Osama's neighborhood actually accidentally live tweeted the whole event from his house! He had no idea what was going on, but now that he looks back, he was literally the first to report what was happening...next door! 

EX: (@ReallyVirtual -Sohaib Athar)

1:53 AM "A huge window-shaking bang here in Abbottabad Cantonment. I hope it's not the start of something nasty"

and ending with:

10:30 AM "Uh, oh, now I'm the guy who live blogged the Osama air raid without knowing it."

 It's like me tweeting about my neighbor playing a video game, except my roommate isn't the world's most dangerous terrorist. And he doesn't have a beard! So there. Twitter. Changing and reporting and spreading the news of the world. The next time you want to say or do something....maybe it'd be more efficient if you just tweeted it!

-Emmanuel Delfin

Chief Twitter Tweeter of Tweeting Tweets

Outside the White House Tonight

Geez...don't they have school tomorrow?

"Justice had Been Done" Obama on Osama's Death

Osama Been Gone

BREAKING NEWS:

Tonight, the White House announced that the US Military has possession of the body of Al Quaeda's mastermind Osama Bin Laden. He was killed in a mansion outside Islamabad, Pakistan with his family inside as well on April 24th, 2011 (around a week ago). DNA was used to determine his identity, after a covert ground attack. There are no reports on how many other key terrorists leaders have been killed; President Obama is set to give more information in the East Room shortly.

It appears that President Barack Obama and his administration was primarilly in charge of the operation, and a "fire fight" ultimately brought him, down. The operation was taken over by "US Military Assets"; and Obama said America would fight for its citizens "relentlessly."

Crowds are outside the White House chanting "USA. USA. USA."

In fear of a retaliation by Al Quaeda, military bases and much of the government buildings in the United States and abroad are being put on full alert.

Ron Shelby

Chief News Correspondent

EMMANUEL DELFIN'S BOTTOM OF THE PAGE:

-FOX NEWS's Gerrardo Rivera just accidentally said, "Obama was dead."

-A mansion in Pakistan?! Really?! They let him live in a mansion?
-It appears he has been dead for a while...where is he?

-It took 10 years to kill him...I have no punch line, cuz this is a joke.

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